So, I know this may sound lame, but I read little women over my vacation and came across this quote..."Better be happy old maids than unhappy wives, or unmaidenly girls, running about to find husbands" and it made me feel better. It seems women long, long ago felt the same way sometimes. That also kind of unnerves me because it means that we haven't come very far in over a hundred years. At some point in the next ten years, I would like to settle down and have a family, but honestly, I want to marry someone for love, not because I want a husband or because I'm lonely. I also am not to type to be pushy and forward (secretly, I can't stand those girls). I mean I don't have a problem with the girl asking the guy out or paying or anything like that, I have a problem with the desperate girls who would spread their legs just to not be alone or to get what they want. I have no respect for them. That's what I read when I read unmaidenly girls.

I'm nervous about going back to Nashville. Part of me really does hate it and it's because I can't really trust anyone down there. The one person I did trust destroyed that trust like no other and now I can't decide whether I even want him in my life. A huge part of me says no, but another huge part of me can't forget how he helped me when my mom passed away. When no one else was there, he was and that's hard to forget. I'm just so angry and so sad about the entire episode. Anyway, I have a few close friends, but there always seems a barrier and it's just not fun a lot of the time. Maybe it's me and I just have to relax and let go. Oh well, I don't have a choice.

Off for the last couple of hours of my freedom and vacation. Then it's back to the grind.